Saturday at the CarreFour Department Store

This is my last weekend in Wuhan, but I have many errands to do to get supplies for my classes next week. Nonetheless, I put the Chinese "Do Not Disturb" sign on my door and sleep until 9:00 a.m., thereby missing breakfast at the hotel. So I walk the mile to the taxi stop, catch the second taxi that comes my way and head over to Starbucks which is near the Chinese shopping center where I hope to find some classroom items. In the five weeks I've been in China, I have not been in any American establishments like Starbuck, KFC, MacDonalds, and the like. But today, a tall latte and a muffin sound good. And sure enough, Starbucks is Starbucks here too. $5.00 U.S. for a latte and muffin, just like in Tucson. I don't know how they attract Chinese customers at those prices, but they do. I'm the only foreigner in Starbucks.

It's expected to be 101 ∘today, with 90+% humidity. It can't be far from that at 10:00 a.m., add to that a blistering sun. The solar eclipse on the 22nd isn't far off, and it is expected that Wuhan will be clear and one of the best viewing sites in Asia next week.

The shopping mall is six stories with hundreds of tiny shops and one very large department store. Escalators, moving inclines without steps, and stairs are everywhere. There doesn't seem to be a "floorplan." I am shopping for a little white dress that will pass for a wedding dress, four bridal headbands/veils, artificial flowers and two fake wedding rings, all of these for a play we are giving next week. I'm also shopping for a gift for my daughter-in-law Lori (more about this later). I have no idea if any of these items are sold in this mall. None of the shop signs are in English, so I start out just window-shopping.

The dress should be easy; 50-60 shops sell girls' dresses. The difficulty is that the girl who will wear this dress in the play is the largest girl in the class. An XL dress in China would be about a size 4 U.S. Cissi is not size 4. At each shop I try to explain the concept "bigger." Shop clerks do not speak English as a rule. They have no need for English because Wuhan is not a tourist town. I shopped for about two hours and did not see anyone my size or a single foreigner.

Finally I find a dress I think might work. I can read the price, so I take my yuan and the dress to the checkout counter. I hand both to the cashier. This sets off quite a hubbub. The two clerks confer in Chinese and then call the manager. She does speak a little English. She tells me, more or less, that the dresses are two-for-one. Pay the regular price and get two dresses. I ask if I can buy only one. "No". I buy the dress anyway (and get two dresses, of course). Clothes are very cheap here.

Then I buy four glittery headbands to which we will attach either flowers or veils (I don't have either yet). I keep shopping for about 30 more minutes when I come to the CarreFour Department Store. Soon I have potato chips (for me), napkins to go with a birthday cake we're having for a birthday party next week, and wonder of wonders, the Chinese soup spoons and bowls I've been looking for for Lori. It takes me quite awhile to choose eight Chinese soup bowls of two different patterns, eight Chinese soup spoons, a plate, and a large soup ladle. These dishes are so heavy I realize it's time to check out and take my current purchases home.

I glance around for a checkout stand. None, bu yao (not available). Finally, in my American sign language I explain "pay" and "check out" to a young Chinese shopper. He points up to the next floor. It turns out that all goods (including groceries) bought anywhere in this multilevel store are paid for on the top floor. Think a super super Walmart with check out on the top floor. No problem. I ride the moving incline (no steps) up to the top floor and bumble around until I find the check out.

There are 36 checkout stands, but only six are manned. In the neighborhood of 250-300 Chinese are trying to check out. I am the only foreigner. I know this because I looked around for the shortest line (American that I am) before taking my position. However, in China there is no "shortest" line. You just choose one of the long lines. There are about 35 people in front of me (with grocery carts filled to the brim ̀a la Costco).

After about 15 minutes, it appears that I haven't moved more than five feet. Why? Because in true Chinese style, someone just arbitrarily started a new megaline of his own that is now merging into ours. No one objects. So now I'm in worse condition than when I began. I'm also hot and my feet hurt.

Ten more minutes. That unofficial secondary line clears, and we seem to be making a little progress when a well-dressed Chinese woman starts making a new tributary on our shopping river. The housewife behind me just isn't having it. She gets out of line (which is dangerous here because people will not let you back in) and gives "well-dressed" a real talking to. "Well-dressed" gets the picture and moves elsewhere. Our assertive housewife flashes me a big smile and gets back in line with me.

Emboldened by "assertive", the woman in front of me picks up my hand-carried basket and puts it in her shopping cart. She can see that I'm losing heart in this line. She smiles too. Then "assertive" and the woman in front of me form a wire barricade with their two shopping carts to prevent anyone from entering our line. They stand me to the side out of the way. All three of us smile. NO ONE messes with us now. Soon (40 minutes from when I signed up) we are checking out.

I put my goods on the counter and pull out my wad of yuan. I think I'm finally home free. Nothing can stop me now. BUT four of the soup bowls have a barcode that will not scan so I CANNOT BUY THEM. That's right, I cannot buy the soup bowls. No price check, no sending the bagger to check on the price. And I don't blame the salesclerk. She's got millions of shoppers right behind me. Their business is as good as mine. So I give up the soup bowls. I don't actually give them up; the store clerk takes them and puts them under her counter.

"Assertive" won't have it. She really chews out the sales clerk. I know just what she's saying in Chinese: "She's been standing here all this time and now you tell her she can't buy soup bowls. She's an American besides. Ask someone the price of the bowls." No way, Chiquita. "Assertive" keeps insisting. The clerk keeps checking me out.

The clerk also rejects the soup ladle that I finally decided on. It doesn't have a barcode at all. I pay quickly before anything else happens. I brought my own bag (you bring one or you buy one here), and bag my purchases, including the dishes (no tissue paper or anything to protect the dishes).

"Assertive" gives me a fabulous smile and a wave. I do the same. Gentlemen, make no mistake about it. Women world-wide speak the same language, the language of sisterhood.